If I could tell you one thing it would be to stop. Just stop.
Stop trying to do so much.
Stop trying to be perfect.
And for goodness sake, stop putting yourself last.
It seems, as a society, that we’ve lost the ability to focus on one thing at a time. We proudly “multi-task” and brag about how much we can get done in a day. We flit from one thing and then another in an attempt to show the world, and prove to ourselves, how much we can do. Saying that we can DO IT ALL is a badge of honor these days. It’s a competition of worthiness. But, here’s the deal... science (yes, real science, actual facts, real reality) says that we can only do one thing WELL, one thing at a time. To add more things into the time we have means we dilute our successes until great becomes good becomes mediocre becomes phoning it in becomes failure.
This is especially true when learning something new. To absorb and internalize something new, say a language or a skill or a process, we need to break the process down into manageable parts and focus on them one at a time; give each step our full attention. Every day. Learning something new requires consistency and focus. And one more thing... simplicity.
There’s no doubt that you’ve got to be committed to the outcome. You wouldn’t have the goal if you weren’t somehow benefitting from it getting accomplished. Regardless if it’s at work and someone assigned you a goal or if it’s personal and you have something you want to achieve because you care about it and it matters to you, you want to succeed and you want to do it well.
So, why oh why do we sabotage our efforts to be in a right sized body with a multi-tasking mindset? Why do we make it so complicated and so painful that “failure” becomes the only option? We are told from day one of what I call “diet school”, the societal expectation that we must be thin to be of value and the industry that wants us to be yo-yo’s to keep their coffers filled, that to lose weight we must exercise and eat right. The two things go together like peas and carrots, right? You gotta have both to have success.
But that’s not exactly true.
I want you to go back to your last goal setting class. To reach a goal, you break down that goal into manageable pieces with milestones. You start at the smallest increment you can and then work on one thing at a time. Getting into your right sized body (RSB, for simplicity) is no different. Start with the one thing that will have the biggest impact... your food. Master that FIRST. Focus on getting that right to the exclusion of all else. It might take you months. It could take you a year. But so what? You’ve spent great swaths of your life on the roller coaster, right? Why not take the time it takes to learn a new way to eat. You take on food first because it has the biggest impact on your goal to be in your RSB. Exercise can come next, when you’ve achieved mastery over your food.
Uncoupling these two things from your self-care quest is essential. You absolutely want to give yourself the best odds for success. It’s a heavy lift, changing your lifestyle. Why make it more complicated?
Keep it simple, Sister. Stop multi-tasking and start succeeding.
Follow my adventures as I take on a new life following the Bright Line Eating program.
I am not affiliated with Bright Line Eating and the opinions I express here are mine alone. For more information on Bright Line Eating, go HERE.